A small kind of detachment

January 10th, 2024

I don't know if that can be done, but I hope so. I need to learn (or develop) a way where I can detach myself from the problems of others. It is still too easy for me to get involved with situations and issues that affect other people, and that has a significantly negative effect on my emotional state and my well-being. What is very difficult with this problem is that those people are usually very close to me and, in most cases, I take for granted that my involvement (if only emotional) is normal, or a required thing to do. Most of the time, I don't actually need to do anything when I am faced with another person’s problems, except maybe to say a good word or lend a sympathetic ear to listen. But the fact itself of me being aware of the problem or an issue, causes me to change my way of thinking — I push myself and my problems to the back while bringing the other person’s to the forefront. And, since in most cases, I cannot do anything that would help that other person, this situation leaves me feeling angry and impotent. And constantly mulling over the said situation in my head, forgetting or losing interest in my problems. That leads to a dangerous situation where suddenly a small problem I had becomes a big one, or a few problems suddenly become many. In a situation like that, I usually am the last one to notice that something wrong is happening to me. That leads to the cumulation of personal problems that can become overwhelming. I am aware of that, but simple awareness doesn't help here — I still catch myself lending my time and emotions to others, and leaving myself out cold.