Indifference

October 8th

When I was younger, I thought I can change the world. That I can make everybody happy and content and everybody will enjoy peace and prosperity — if only they would listen to me and my ideas and accept and do what I tell them. To accomplish that, I could become a dictator/tyrant and force everybody to do my bidding (but I didn’t know how to go about it) or as my other option — to become involved in politics. And that’s exactly what I did, I joined the political party that was closest to my ideas and my social views and went into action — going to the meetings, being involved in the grassroots movement, canvassing for votes, registering new voters, etc. In college, my major was political science and A LOT of my time was spent on increasing my political knowledge — reading books, writing letters to the editor, and even on a couple of occasions writing a column in a local newspaper. Then, with an ascent of the internet, I got involved in message boards for my party and the opposition as well (to troll them and to see what they are up to). It was a big and important part of my life and I couldn’t even possibly imagine that it might ever change.

But it did. Over the last few years, I’ve noticed that I spend less and less time on politics. I was less emotionally involved in all that was happening in local, national, and world politics. I still wanted to be informed about what was happening and see how we, little people, are being used and abused by those in charge. There also happened several just ridiculous political events that shook me and made me question my sanity and stupidity of the general population of those who vote (two of those are Brexit and Trump being elected as president of the USA… but there were more). Simply I become disappointed in the whole political process and defeated by the inaction of regular people to ill-treatment from those in power (as an example I can give a story of Panama Papers that should be a huge deal, but it just fizzled away).

And over last months I’ve noticed that my diminished interest made me become indifferent to all that is happening in politics. I just don’t care anymore. I don’t know if that change is something good or not; I mean, I sleep better not knowing/caring about some things, but seeing the complete bullshit from every side of the political spectrum and how it will affect all of us in the coming years makes me feel like I should do something. I just don’t know.

And I don’t want to change the world anymore, I just don’t want it to get any worse.