Is it a good time to talk about it NOW?
When the hell is a good time to talk about things that are wrong and dangerous? Before anything happens? But if nothing happened, then maybe it is not a good time. After a close call? But he surely learned his lessons, so why bring it up now? After the tragedy? But now it is not a good time either — lets just hope he pulls through first.
A quick update on a car crash and my cousin who was involved in it — an hour ago he was upgraded from critical to a serious, but stable condition. His life is not in immediate danger. His left leg is crushed with bones broken in multiple places, and most likely he will never regain full mobility. Broken ribs, punctured lung, broken cheekbone, broken eye socket, (slight) brain hemorrhage. That is his condition right now, and there is a long way to recover and regain any semblance of his previous lifestyle for him.
And the update on the crash itself — first information from the police is that the truck driver started an overtaking maneuver when he had no room to safely do it and caused the crash. And the truck driver will be charged with something. But my cousin was driving WAY over the speed limit and had no chance to react when the other driver made a mistake. And that is how my cousin drives, always in a hurry, always speeding. At 32 years old, he already lost his driver's license several times when he went over the limit for driving penalty points from too many tickets for moving violations. He had several car crashes before, but nothing so serious as this one yesterday. I rode with him as a passenger several times, and he was always driving way above the speed limit, and driving aggressively and dangerously. I felt uneasy, maybe even scared with him behind the wheel. But I never said anything about it to him. I told about those experiences to my siblings, and they had exactly the same incidents with him as a driver. And they haven't said anything about to him as well….
I don’t know if anybody else had ever told him about his dangerous driving. I don’t know if he would listen and change anything about his driving. I simply don't know — but if I or somebody else would say something, maybe he would listen and slow down, and would be able to react in time to a dangerous situation on the road. But I guess there was never a good time to say something until it was too late. So, when exactly is a good time to say something unpleasant but true to another person? Now, I know that a good time is exactly when something that requires admonition is happening, and not “later”. I hope that this knowledge stays with me.