It’s not just nostalgia, this wonderful gloomy song. It had to be in the late 80s when I heard it on the radio. Radio, especially channel 3 on Polish national radio was my connection to everything that was happening in the world. I was always curious, always on the lookout for something new. I loved those songs, so-called new wave. I had no idea at that time that it was actually a genre of pop music. It was just a good music for me. I did not understand the lyrics, just felt an emotional connection.
Long afternoons and evenings in winter, staying in, reading a book with radio playing in the background. It was peaceful, I think I might have been happy at that moment. I had no idea that I couldn’t expect what my future life will bring. Then everything seemed to be an opportunity, I could accomplish whatever I wanted, or what was expected of me. I know, I can never go back to this feeling again. A little of nostalgia reminds me of what could have been.
Now, in my life I have a similar feeling. There is nothing anymore that can stop me from at least trying something new. Again, I’m in full control of my life. For so long something else was controlling my thoughts and emotions, I think I forgot what it feels like to be my ow master. I can discover happiness again.