Low threshold of discomfort

August 18th, 2023

If for a while I suspected it, then now I am sure. I have it. And I might have had it for some time. Over the last week, it has been extremely hot, with temperatures going close to 35C degrees and serious humidity and relentless sunshine. Nights are no better — muggy and sticky with hardly any relief. I feel awful and function in low gear without any interest in any action or thought or motivation. And without any emotions save for brewing anger and constant bitching about how awfully hot it is.

But I lived for much hotter and much, much longer periods of time than I experience now. I remember summers in New Jersey when it would get about 35 degrees in June and it lasted until September — with much more debilitating humidity. And I lived through it with many issues. I just dealt with it by mostly avoiding checking the weather forecast and staying hydrated. It was unpleasant, but quite possible to handle. All I needed was to brace myself and go along with the weather as something I couldn't change and had no influence over.

Now that I am older, I suffer much more from acute discomfort caused by the weather — too hot, too cold, too dry, too wet, too sunny, or too cloudy….

I think that might have something to do with the word I used above — older. That might be the reason for my growing discomfort. And it is rather strange — as I get older I have become more comfortable in social situations, I got in better shape physically than I was 5 or 10 years ago, I have become smarter and more erudite and more rhetorical, and I have become a better person overall. But on a physical level, my need for comfort skyrocketed and any discomfort is felt much more painfully and for much longer. It is hard for me to adjust my expectations to the reality when it comes to nature, and I don't really like it.