Mistaken heroism

January 17th, 2023

This age is no longer conducive to real acts of heroism — saving the downtrodden from the oppression of those in power, protecting and supporting those suffering from harassment and bigotry because of their race or religion, or gender, or staying true to your morals and keeping your integrity in face of overwhelming odds of the modern world. Or refusing to play the expected and potentially satisfying but ultimately rigged game of Instagram-like success in life. Or doing something brave and ethical for the betterment of humankind. Now heroism seems to be risking and ultimately damaging your health for some reason — mostly for benefit of somebody else.

There is a guy coughing and wheezing sitting two desks down from me. He already told everybody that his wife and daughters have flu and he might be coming down with it as well. Even though he was told to go and work from home, he refuses because — “he has a presentation today, and a client is coming and those files need to be done”. I spoke with another coworker on the phone today and she could barely talk with extreme hoarseness. She is also running a high fever (as she told me) and is working from home, but working anyway when she is clearly sick as a dog because — “who else will take care of this or that?”. And there was a discussion between other coworkers today — one has 54 vacation days, and the other 49 to be used this year. And they were told by the management that they need to finally go on vacation and use up at least some of those days. I wish I was in a position like that — but they were very vocal and complaining that taking time off work is just a waste of time, besides they are extremely INDENSPENSIBLE and constantly needed here because — “without me nothing will get done the whole process will fail and the company will go to hell”.

That is so wrong, I have no words to describe it. But I will try — it seems that it became normal and even expected to suffer for the sake of the work. It seems like this is the new heroism for the modern era :

Even when sick, I still can get the job done and be at work. Vacations? What vacations — a waste of time, I will rather be working 24/7. And spreading sickness and despair onto colleagues and coworkers? To hell with them — I am so important and essential that I will crawl to the office if I need to to get the job done.

That is not only bullshit but also so pathetic… Of course, there are good reasons why this behavior can be excused — when you cannot afford to take time off or you are afraid you might lose your job or position which can be extremely dangerous in today’s economy. But killing yourself for benefit of a faceless corporation with a grandeur illusion of importance is not one of those reasons. There is nothing heroic about that, it is just a pitiful insecurity. Of course, I would never dream to say out loud what I think about it and what I wrote about it here — I am not a brave hero as well.