November 23rd, 24th, 25th

I feel terribly disappointed in myself and no, I didn't drink, I wasn't even close to doing it. The last three days were pretty much the same — work, home, internet, and sleep. I had plenty of things planned to do but instead of doing them, I preferred to wallow in self-pity. I feel like I am wasting my time. I thought once sober I will be a different person — I am not. I feel lazy and without a purpose in life. I know how dangerous it is in my therapy, I need to talk about it tomorrow with Ada. It seems like I lost all energy and enthusiasm for doing anything productive. I hope I can change it soon….