Place in society

May 28th, 2023

I am not proud of those moments but they happen and I rather talk it out than try to pretend that they didn't and everything is ok while I am in truth steaming inside. Those are moments when I question my place in society and my endeavors for its betterment and even if any care for society is worthwhile. That happened yesterday on the packed train where there was no option to change seats and for more than two hours I and other passengers were a captive audience to a painfully terrifying display. I saw and heard (even through the headphones) the unbelievable arrogance and loudness and uncouthness and vulgarity and coarseness of language and behavior and boorishness of a bunch of drunk simpletons. There were no more than 25 years old, on the outside well-groomed and well-dressed men and women (but completely rotten on the inside) who were doing it, and if that is the future of the society I live in, then it is better to cut off any of association with it than keep any illusions about where our society, in general, is going.

Today I feel much better. I know that most of the people around me are good and considerate people, even if timid in the face of loud rudeness — and I am exactly like that as well. I have very few illusions and hopes about the direction where we all going (or rather sleepwalking) but there is still a sliver of optimism in me. And I will not let some outside forces — even when on display right in front of me — take this meek belief away from me. I will try to ignore what I can of the bad issues in society (while knowing that they are there) and rather focus on what is good and try to add my part to help society to evolve into some better iteration.