Procrastination

November 3rd

Over the last couple of weeks, I wasn’t feeling quite well myself. Like there is this underlining fear? uncertainty? anxiety? about something in my life. And there are some things going on in my life that are not resolved and they weigh on my mind for sure. Some of those things are beyond my control — all I can do is to wait and push for more information so I can make decisions about them. For others — in my personal life and at work as well — I’ve noticed that I am actively trying to avoid either making a decision or trying to postpone any action on my part. I don’t know why — those things will not go away, they will not resolve themselves without my participation. It seems that I want to avoid actions and decisions that might be unpleasant but necessary. I know I cannot indefinitely postpone my responsibilities and the best way to approach it is to just do it. If it will be unpleasant or embarrassing or if it will require me to go out of my comfort zone (and out of my laziness) — so be it. It will be the same today or if I do it next week, but if I do it today at least my mind will be clear that this task is done and I can move on. It seems like I am falling into an old routine of avoiding making decisions and hoping to wait it out — and I know it simply does not work. So — there will be a quick change today. I have a list of things to do and I will go line by line and do them in the best way I can — starting now.

It will be unpleasant but I know that tomorrow I will feel better!