Tiredness

September 15th

I am tired, very tired. Tiredness usually starts on Monday morning and lasts until Friday afternoon. Afternoons and weekends on Monday to Thursday are tiresome as well — I do have some energy to do something, to go for a walk or a bike ride or read a book — but most of the time I spend those hours mindlessly staring at the computer or a cell phone screen. Sometimes I don’t even have the energy to do my dishes or prepare proper lunch for the next day. On weekends, even when I have to do physically demanding work I am able to easily recover and have the energy and will to do all want. Weekdays are just terrible and I feel like I am wasting my life and those good years I still have in me. I am tired of all the noise at work, all those inane conversations I hear all around me, the same songs played on the same radio station every day. All the stupid questions and demands where I am doing stuff just for the sake of doing something so my boss can show it to her higher-ups. It all seems insane.

And tiresome, terribly tiresome.

I need, no — strike it — I WILL make major changes in the next several days. I need it and I deserve better than the current muck in my life.